Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Chapter 4, World's financial mess, as explained by Phua Chu Kang

Exam oh....exammm 


Chapter Four: Hedge Fund is the Real Sorhai?

In order to find the sorhais who are willing to put out such big sum of money for this type loan, the Investment Bankers did a lot of road show and even engage professionals to make their powerpoint presentation look solid.

After that, they invited groups and groups of sorhais to come listen to them talk c*ck, drink wine and see their powerpoint.

When the powerpoint presentation said that the average return on CDO is approximately 12%, the saliva of the Hedge Fund managers started to drool, so they decided to put their money in and play the game also!

Before you jump into the conclusion that hedge fund are the sorhai, let's look at how the hedge fund got so much money....

The basic job function of hedge fund managers are killing each other at wall street without seeing any blood!

They are the one who go around the world, screw peoples currency, stock markets, commodities so the CDO is only a small case la !

The hedge fund managers went around the world and look for low interest loan.

For example, Japan interest rate has been very low since the day Karaoke machinese was invented.

So, the hedge fund went to Japan and borrow at 1.5% which means, they just have to sign a few signatures, get the money from Japanese and then give to the investment banks and they can sit home masturbate and enjoy a net return of 10% without doing anything.

With deal like that, the more they borrow, the more their return la!

Do you still call them sorhai?

keep yourself updated.................

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